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[GeeBeezy]

Love that book 

[Chairlegs]

I know this is the wrong thread but...
I am currently reading that book (Re-reading really)
I am up to the bit where they are rescued
though the probability for that happening is
2^{2,079,460,347} to 1 against.

[Panzercrappitastica]

Those books are so awesome XD

[Chairlegs]

Thank you...
I try my best

[Chairlegs]

The Past, Present and Future walk into a bar
it was tense

[GeeBeezy]

Love that one.

My teacher said; 'Besly, name two pronouns'

I said; 'Who, me?'

[Chairlegs]

Teacher (to Jimmy): You missed school yesterday. Why?
Jimmy: Sorry Miss, I had a sore arm...
Teacher: Okay, that is understandable.
Jimmy: So I had a terrible aim.

[GeeBeezy]

Sergeant: 'PRIVATE SMITH!'
Smith: 'YES SIR!?'
Sergeant: 'I DIDN'T SEE YOU IN CAMOUFLAGE PRACTICE TODAY!'
Smith: 'THANK YOU SIR!'

[Chairlegs]

At home we have nicknames we some times use for my brothers
I am: Major. Disturbance
My little Brother is: Private. Parts
My older Brother is: General. Sarcasm
 

[BlueberryDoughnut]

"Sir! We're surrounded by enemy fire!"
"Excellent! Now we can attack in any direction we please!"

[Chairlegs]

A Private accidentally falls in the mud whilst trekking to the enemy lines
The General yells: "Good work man, camouflaging yourself!"
So everyone who where at the back of the line,
who happen to be Majors start to roll in the mud because they wanted to impress the General
When The back of the line reaches the General
The General Yells again:
"Stop playing in the mud, we are on a Battle Field!"

[GeeBeezy]

'Sir! They've surrounded us!'
'Poor b@$7@&2s'

[Chairlegs]

MATH

M.ental
A.buse
T.o
H.umans

[GeeBeezy]

Latin is a language, as dead as dead can be.
It killed the ancient Romans, and now it's killing me.

[Chairlegs]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
sugar is sweet
and so are you

But the roses are wilted
The violets are dead
The sugar bowl is empty
And so is your head