To my continuing series of Things I Will Miss In Mexico, allow me to add Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy!
Our whole baÃ±o here is tiled with fanciful tiles, but none is more fanciful than Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy. His most popular tile, in which he rides a bicycle, happens to be exactly at eye level (seated). It thus lends itself to dutiful contemplation, including such questions as:
1. Is a skeleton riding a bike funny enough? (No, it has to be a drunken skeleton!)
2. Is the skeleton wearing a hat, or some sort of bubble-making device? (Oh, right. It’s a hat. Those bubbles are drunkenness.)
3. Is the skeleton smiling? Laughing? Screaming in a terrifying way? Singing drunkenly?
4. Am I really sitting here contemplating a skeleton?
But wait, there’s more! Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy doesn’t just ride bicycles. He also plays football:
Oddly, American-style football, not the local gooooooal-oriented version.
And he engages in wrestling-type activities with his friends:
(At least, I hope wrestling is what this is. Unless it’s that really cool Brazilian martial-arts dance invented by guys in chains. Nah, probably wrestling.)
But best of all, Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy is a totally cool surfer dude:
So as I contemplate returning to my drab America bathroom with its non-delirious tiles, I know that I will miss him.
Hasta luego, Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy!
PS. Kids, don’t ride bikes drunk. Also, wear a real helmet, not a comical hat, even if it does make bubbles. Skeletal Bathroom Tile Guy doesn’t have to worry about safety issues because, you know, he’s already dead.